Sick in Beauty

How lucky that we have chosen to come to this beautiful island of Koh Lanta for our initiation to Thailand! We’ve both been pretty sick with respiratory infection and we’ve had to take it really slow. Some days I don’t even eat! Imagine sitting in a gorgeous little beach side café in Thailand, holding a menu offering delicious food, and not wanting to order anything!  My recovery has been slow. I’ve been to the doctor twice. Yesterday I finally gave in to prescription drugs. I slept my first full night and the coughing has finally begun to subside.

I think I feel guilty about being on vacation. “Vacation” has always meant, for me, ‘to vacate’, a practice that I needed in my life to allow for stress reduction and relaxation.  My heavy work schedule, busy family life, desires to continue learning, and my commitment to social justice, kept me constantly busy and stressed! Vacation was a necessary remedy for that choice of life style! My life is still full. I love the work I do with teachers and youth. I’m still committed to social justice. My family still takes a lot of my time. I have an array of interests that keep me learning and occupied. I have a rich and colourful social life. I just don’t have the same kind of stress any more! My ‘vacation’ needs have changed.

I’m not used to allowing myself to be sick either. I rarely took off sick days from work, and my kids were hardly ever home from school either. We have been, generally, a very healthy group. This week I’ve taken advantage of the chance to be sick. If we were here for a couple of weeks, I might feel badly, as if I were wasting precious ‘vacation’ time. But I have the luxury of taking this little reprieve and allowing myself to heal.

Paul and I travel a lot during this time of our lives. That might change soon, as we are embarking on building our house on Gabriola. In the meantime, we travel in the winter months. We never think of it as a vacation. It is for us, an opportunity for exploration, learning, and engaging with others, as we experience living in different cultures.

So, what have I been doing? Actually….not much!

Each morning when no on else is awake, I go outside of our thatched hut and walk down the path towards the beach. As I move, the music of nature overwhelms me. Insects of all kinds, unusual birds, each take their turn to express their own life song. They are waking up to a new day too, and joining me as I do the same. The ocean, settles where it meets with the light, soft brown sand. The waves roll in to moisten the ground as the crashing sound finds it’s place in harmony with the rest. I sit quietly on the sand listening each morning, until, Whela, the owner of the café comes for his long working day. We say “Good morning”, and talk a bit about how we each slept and then, as we continue our conversation, we cover the tables with cloths and fasten them each with four clothespins. “Thank you”, he says! It is completely ‘my pleasure’.

I have been reading books faster than I have read since I was teenager! Diana, a friend of mine from Toronto is my book Guru. She sends me 5 book recommendations at a time when I request. I get the books onto my Kindle, and read through them, one by one. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been able to spend a whole day reading books! And I have read such great books since I’ve been away! It’s been fantastic!

I have been too sick to practice Yoga. And my body craves Asana! So I’ve discovered Thai Massage! With an experienced Thai masseuse, Yoga practice is done for me. Kneading, stretching, pulling, pounding, twisting, when my massage is done, I feel as if I have had an hour of asana. Today was the first day I was able to practice in the morning on my own. But I still intend to visit Anha later for my daily Thai massage!

I think we’ll take one more day to recuperate. It’s beautiful here. We now know many of the people and we’re comfortable. What am I doing? Not much! And for now…. that’s just fine!