Just sayin’……
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The Malayalam word for ‘thank you’ is nanni.
It is a word I rarely hear. People just don’t say ‘thank you’ very often. There
is, however, a perpetual tone of gratitude. Maybe it has to do with the
cultural attitude about God. I remember once, when I thanked my Yoga teacher’s
mother for cooking our meal, Sajee answered with what seemed like a correction,
“Thank you, food.” Ultimately our gratitude is to God, without whom nothing
would exist.
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There is a different sense of personal
space here. On public buses, men and women are encouraged to sit separately
with women in the front, and men in the back. Yesterday, I board the bus to
find that the only empty seat is towards the back. I am not discouraged. I sit in the single empty seat, even
though I am surrounded by men. I feel okay. So why does the ticket taker insist
on standing right on top of me so close that he pushes me right up against the
window. He could have stood anywhere. Why did he have to stand so close to me?
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There is no reprieve from populated areas throughout
the province of Kerala. Travelling from one town to another means travelling through one town and another. They all look the same. Colourful displays of women in
saris scurrying through he streets, men in simple dhotis drinking tea together
and hanging out, motorcycles, scooters, bicycles, and cars, ornately decorated
buses and trucks, and cows and goats fill the streets.
On beaches woman wear full saris and, if
they choose to go into the ocean, they do so fully clothed. Men wear whatever
they want, usually western style bathing suits, or stripped down to their
underwear. Respectfully, when I go to the beach I wear my typical western
clothing, which isn’t the least bit provocative, and I go in the ocean fully
clothed. It’s not so bad, although I still prefer the freedom of bathing suits.
I think the thing I notice most here is the
lack of choice. Though people are generally satisfied with life, they really
know nothing different. Sandia, the woman who oversees our homestay, has never
been out of Kerala. “Fort Cochin, Kollam, Kalikut, I go only there.” Generally,
people here have little desire to leave India. Vacations, if they are lucky
enough to have them, usually happen in other parts of the state. People just
love their country...and know nothing else.
I am continuously reflecting on the cultural
diversity that we share with these wonderful people. So much of how we behave
is so different. I have finally gotten to a stage where I try not to think too
much about it. Life here is just the way it is….it isn’t good or bad….it just
is. If I think too much about it, if I try to understand, I end up creating
stories that might not be true. I am finding it easier to just let the
experience happen. Why question? I am letting go of the need to understand. I
don’t understand! I just live, and learn and embrace! I’m just sayin’…….
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